“HYPOCRITE IS WHAT YOU ARE” (a conversation)

Kamustha Folks!

“It is finally here….yaaaay” she screamed. Looking up from my book, I enquired as to what had piqued her interest. “The New Year horoscopes are here!!” I stared at her expecting her to laugh it off as some joke but she looked at me expecting a reply for the very serious statement she had just announced. “Umm…okay” I replied. “Oh! Cummon you are telling me you do not want to know how this year is going to turn out for you?” she asked with her eyes marked in disbelief. I, finding it pointless to continue the conversation returned back to my book not bothering to give her a reply.

However, her remark got me thinking. The beginning of a new year updates events every month. The update of one’s age, the update of one’s positions both geographically and socially, the update of one’s decisions and so on. The unpredictability of what would happen to oneself over the course of the next 365 days kills us. Humans do not like not knowing and unfortunately their own future happens to be one of them and hence they turn to a medium of bogus spread. But can you blame them?

“I am going to read your horoscope anyway. Interested or not, I do not care” she remarked. “I do not want to know how this year is going to be filled with prosperity and sadness or any other emotion whatsoever.” I replied before she got started. “But why?” she asked, her voice lined with disappointment. Faced with no other way than to acknowledge her interest in reading out my stars, I agreed. So she read out how my year was going to be. She did not fail to skip anything and read out the position of my stars and its apparent significance on my relationships with others, my failures, my personal life, my social life and so on. Even though my etiquette demanded eye contact, my mind refused to be enslaved to the predictions she was so willingly reading out. Don’t get me wrong, my ears were more than willing to listen to what she had to say and so listen they did. So after she read out my horoscope she looked at me gravely, “I am sorry, looks like this year is fucked up for you”. I looked at her serious face and laughed so loud. Alarmed at my response she sought to ask me the reason for my unexpected reply. “My horoscope has predicted a lot of things over the past couple of years. It predicted how I am going to score a percentage of above 90 in my boards which happened not even in my dreams, it predicted as to how my life is going to go through drastic changes which has happened and let us just not even go to the predictions of my personal life”. Searching for a point in the few sentences I just spoke, she voiced it out. “My point is, my life is fucked up but so is yours and every other person you come across. If you read out my horoscope or even yours for that matter in search of a difference for your mere satisfaction of things turning out differently, you are quite naïve. Even if your horoscope says that this year is going to bring you joy and a ton of new friends, there is no guarantee for it to ever happen and you might at the end of this year curse yourself for relying on your horoscope to make this year a better one. However, the next year, this ritual will be repeated again. But if hope is what you are looking for, I have no comments on that.” Her reply, let’s just say included the hosting of a finger.

Readers, she later did ask me a question that she debated in her mind for about five minutes, “ Why can’t you like a normal person just go with the whole act?”. My reply included silence as my mind went back to the book I was reading and the lines read, ‘Hypocrite is what you are’.

I smiled.




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