TYPES OF READERS

Kamustha Folks!

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Drafting this piece right before my English exam is probably not a good idea but trust me, it is much needed. As much as I love literature and have over the course of the past one year learnt to love all the complicated and twisted meanings hidden in the most simplest of words, one would have to agree with me on the need of a break from all those complicated poetry and to simply write and converse in modern English. So this piece is for all you readers out there. Irrespective of what the society classifies you, if you love books and share a passion for reading, you are a reader no matter what they say. ūüôā

  1. THE IMPATIENT ONE :

You know..those readers that walk into bookstores and take a random book and flip through the pages and halt to read the last chapter just to know what the book is going to end like and afterwards cash the book all the while acting like they don’t know what the fuck is going to happen when they finish reading the book? Oh yeah! They exist. The constant need to know everything that makes them impatient enough to not finish the book to know what is going to happen but then feels guilty for having ruined the whole emotional experience of reading which leads them to read the whole thing. It is annoying or so I have been told when I do it. Oh yeah! I belong to this category even though my impatience is not as far stretched as I mentioned in the above case, it does manage to get the better of me sometimes. I do actually buy or read the book and through the course, flips to the last sentence of the book and hey if that sentence is telling me something about the book then it ain’t my fault. Other than the need to know the ending, I also believe that a good book has the most remarkable last sentences. I have read a lot of books and the last line that you read of that book, you know the one line that you remember the book by after closing it, has an important influence over how you categorize the book. Yeah! I know the society finds this trait to be of great annoyance and if anyone tells you that it isn’t the right way to read the book, feel free to hoist the finger of your choice high up!

2. THE INFO FREAK:

They can be really creepy too! Those people who just by the mention of the name of a book gives you everything you need to know about the book and by my experience, will give you everything from the author’s crappy lives to the trail of emotions that was going through her mind or from the era to the how critics perceive it all the while never mentioning as to what the story is all about or in other words often leave all the interesting parts of the story and leads you to often not buy any book from the shop. Just kidding! Not really. They mean well and often simply wants to gather information about a book. But if an essay is what you want to write, you now know the type of readers to approach!

3. THE NOISE MAKER:

They contribute a large portion of their knowledge to the society and is often a source of noise pollution. Yep! These readers are the one that read everything loud enough for their ears as well as everyone else’s attention. I have been stuck in a situation where this person next to me was reading the exact same book as me and quite loudly might I add and that was not even the worst part. She was ahead of me in terms of chapters and she literally answered all the questions and suspense packed in the book for me. I had to go and get another book and change my place all because of the detailed spoilers she gave. That is probably why I read in the solace of my room where annoying voices of other readers can’t reach me.

4. THE CONSTANTLY CONFUSED ONE:

All they ever do is ask questions! Every question they discover on the course of their read has to be answered then and there. They might even get agitated if they do not get the answers and often give up reading that book and the only reason thy might give for that particular action of theirs would be: ” I disagree with the author on Chapter 6 where he talks as to how death should be celebrated. I wonder whether he lost someone and was so happy about it that he decided to pen it down in the form of this book. I mean the plot does not make sense. Why do you think the plot does not make sense?” and at this point all you can answer is by politely agreeing with her when all that is going through your mind…I DON’T GIVE A MONKEY’S ASS TO WHAT YOU THINK OF CHAPTER 6.

5. THE SNAIL :

Despite the really offensive term I used to describe you, slow reading can be due to a variety of reasons.

a) You might be a newbie to reading. If you are, then you have nothing to be ashamed of! The point is you are starting something that might change the way you perceive life and might even help you in different aspects of life.

b) If you are an avid reader and are quite surprised when you take an extremely long time for finishing a book that other readers completed twice as fast…don’t worry, you were just created like that. Yeah! shocking I know. Researchers have stated that its all in the eye movements. The angle your eye covers and the speed of your eye movements play an important role in the amount of information you digest when you read.

c) You like it slow and have no where to go! Yeah so what? Some people want the whole process of reading a particular book or all books for that matter to be an insightful experience. They are the readers that one sees to be contemplating on something with a book on their hand (they belong to a type that I will be writing right below this one).

6. THE THINKERS:

They take the whole idea of reading to the next level and often have reasons as to why certain things happened as described in the book. Trust me…they can be fun! When normal people like us go through endless boxes of Kleenex over a characters death, they might surprise us with a version of theirs as to why the death of this character was absolutely crucial for the book and story line in the long run. Oh well you get the idea!

7. THE FAN FICTION FANATICS:

So imagine my shock when I recently asked a fellow classmate who like me had opted for English Lit., what her favorite book was and she replied “I mostly read fan fiction” and gave a huge smile such that her answer was so internally and externally satisfying. Fan fictions are mostly a guilty pleasure that one does not like speaking out aloud about but hey no one is judging you (actually they are!) ¬†But then again most of the books on the market right now are a fan fiction of some other book. I mean the day I came to know that Fifty Shades of Grey was actually a fan fiction of Twilight was a huge day for a fifteen year old me.

(Dear Young Readers,

Please do not read Fifty shades of Grey until you have turned eighteen or at least do a better job at hiding it from any elderly people. The statement being from my very personal experience :/)

8. THE DICTIONARY ADDICTS:

These readers could be the ones you see at cafes with a book and a dictionary and would be checking the meaning of every word they come across whose meanings are not stored in their brains. These people would be really good at vocabulary and spelling bees and may also have great communication skills compared to other readers. These readers has to be appreciated for being able to interrupt their own train of though and the story line every time they come across a word. I mean I have tried to some extent to be one and failed miserably. I  like concentrating at the issue at hand and cannot afford distractions even if it includes a word that might give me a better idea as to what that line is trying to tell me.

9. THE NORMAL ONES:

Yeah! We do have a fairly good amount of readers just being a normal one. Now when I say normal, they have all the above mentioned characteristics just in the right amount such that they cannot be categorized into a particular category and does not come across as crazy or worth envying.

10. PLAIN OLD READERS:

Despite the amount of shade I have thrown in the direction of the method or the reader you are and follow, each of you are worth appreciating. Reading is not an easy hobby like how some of us think it might. There are people who don’t read come up and tell me as to how I am able to spend time reading pages and pages of nothing but words and no pictures (Trust me…certain people still want images to be printed in books and when you look at it, there is nothing wrong in wishing so)

 

~Freida

 

 

I have not written an entry for quite some time and I blame the periodic exams conducted in the field of education for it. As you have read, I started writing this piece somewhere between my exams but discontinued when I realized that I have good chance of submitting a blank sheet in the test next day. 

The above article are about my personal experiences with different types of readers and I do not expect everyone to agree to it so don’t take it personal guys ;/

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